Funny iPhone sms text messages – text messages for iPhone
How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell ‘BINGO!
Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.
The hardest thing in the world to understand is income taxes.
It is better to be beautiful than to be good, but it is better to be good than to be ugly.
If a wolf can take down a deer from either flank, does that make him bambidextrous?
I went too a restaurant that served breakfast at anytime, so i ordered french toast during the renaissance.
Why is the place you drive on is a parkway, and the place you park on is the driveway?
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.
Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it.
I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.
If you smacked a kid in the face with a bottle of Johnson’s No More Tears, would it create beautiful irony?